Because I need more to worry about

About two months ago my dad had major foot surgery. He had broken his foot a long time ago and never gotten it fixed, and he had gotten to the point where he couldn't walk without a came. He saw an orthopedist who apparently told him how awful the rest of his life would be if he didn't get his foot fixed, so he finally broke down and had the surgery he's put off for over 20 years. After the surgery the doctor put this huge monstrosity of a brace on it with pins going into his bones from all directions - 16 in all. My mom said, picture those things they screw into people's heads when they fracture something in their neck, on his foot. It was a monstrosity. My mom had to clean it daily - each pin, unwrapping and wiping and cleaning and wiping and rewrapping. They also discovered my dad had an enlarged prostate and so he ended up with a catheter, that my mom had to learn how to change and clean for him.So he's been at home stuck in bed forever. He's bored and sore and depressed. The stock market crash is destroying him - he's losing all his money. My mom noticed last Wednesday that one of the pins looked like there was an infection around it. She called the doctor and he called in a prescription of antibiotics for him. So he's been taking those and they've been screwing up his stomach. Then Thursday they took him out for Thanksgiving - his first trip outside the house that wasn't to the doctor's office. They had a nice dinner and took a walk (with my brother pushing the wheelchair) on the pier. This Sunday my mom noticed a couple of the pins seemed weirdly loose. They had an appointment Monday so she figured she'd talk to the doctor then. Meanwhile, my dad developed horrible pains in his lower gut and lost control of his bladder. So my mom had to get him Depends. Doctor's visit Monday - my dad has a severe bladder infection. More antibiotics. He hasn't wanted to eat for over a week. i guess he barely ate on Thanksgiving. AND the two pins that were loose - they broke. And the one that looked infected, well, there's a chance my dad has a bone infection. So they had to take the whole contraption off two weeks early which will slow the healing process and keep him in bed even longer than expected.Thursday my mom will find out if he has a bone infection, and if he does he will need intravenous antibiotics for two months. My mom finally broke down and asked for a home health care nurse (thank god). They're going to try to get a male so that he can lift my dad and get him into his wheelchair and take him outside. My mom is exhausted and depressed and my dad told her today he'd be better off dead. This is not my dad. He doesn't talk like this. I'm afraid he's just giving up, and I don't know how to give him any reason to want to go on. I know he's miserable and depressed. I know he can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, and if he chooses he will just give up.I'm scared and sad for him. I don't know what to do for either of them. I'm 2 thousand miles away from them. I thought about going out there but I don't know how Hubby can handle getting Monster to and from school and still get his 8 hours at work in. Besides, M is falling apart since he was kicked out of day treatment and is having more trouble in school than they've seen in ages. I feel like I can't leave him now, because he has his own traumas right now, and sorry to say it, but Hubby is not prepared to deal with Monster on his own for any extended period of time, not now when he blows up at M for doing 6-year-old stuff.